Right now, a lot of you are probably lying to yourself and saying that you will never even look at another piece of chocolate as long as you live. What if I were to tell you that there is a chocolate product that has all of the taste and smell of chocolate without any of the fat, sugar or traces of nuts?

Introducing Le Whif, the innovative fat free choc fix delivery system, from the future. It comes in a variety of flavours (milk chocolate, choc mint etc) and, from what we can gather, it’s like a nicotine inhaler for chocoholics. Or a Ventolin puffer for fatties. If that makes sense. Maybe it doesn’t. Just watch the infomercial and get off my back.